Thwaites face administration....

Crisis-torn Thwaites face yet further trouble with the announcement from the
board of directors that they are set to be placed in administration. The
brewery team, who have been awful in the past two months have plummeted to
bottom of both 7-a-side leagues and second from bottom in the five-a-side
league. Manager Dominic Southworth is under increasing pressure to quit the
brewery team after a series of poor results. Southworth, who helped guide
his team to both 5 and 7-a-side league cups last term has infuriated the
Thwaites supporters after allowing his team to go out on drinking binges
only hours before a game.

The brewery side are believed to be in millions of pounds worth of debt
according to chartered accountants Deloitte & Touché. They are currently
placed joint bottom of the 'richest clubs' list with AC Kabul of
Afghanistan. It is thought that the administrators will be brought in to
steady the already sinking ship. Prized assets like Jamie Hopwood and Damian
Tabbinor could well be offloaded in order to raise cash to save them from
imminent bankruptcy.

Bury FC, already in administration have even donated cash to the brewery
outfit. This shows just what a mess Thwaites are in. With relegation looming
in all three leagues, the turmoil is set to worsen as the loss of TV revenue
will hit Thwates hard in the pocket. Manager Dominic Southworth has been
told to tighten the purse strings on any signings and has been told he will
have to do with what he has got and rely on youth.

Several large benefactors have already been linked with buying out Thwaites,
such as Stella Artois who already have a large sponsorship deal with
midfield maestro Jamie Hopwood.

Thwaites have also confirmed that both Simon Tipton and Dominic Southworth
are facing assault charges. As we reported yesterday, the duo were involved
in a brawl in the early hours of Saturday morning. It is uncertain whether
kebab house owner Tariq Hussein will press charges against Jamie Hopwood as
he went berserk after being served a dodgy kebab. Hussein refused to comment
on allegations that the meat was taken from an old woman's Scottish terrier
which was reported missing to Blackburn police last week.

(Picture, something Thwaites dont have much of)